Archive for the 'Americans' Category

Sin and Sunshine Making Vegas go to Rehab

admin February 16th, 2010

Apparently sin and sunshine doesn’t guarantee you happiness. Our Las Vegas family is quite dysfunctional according to The Gallup-Healthways Well-Being Index. It ranks 162 cities on the happiness of its residents-Las Vegas finished 145th on the list.

So, shall our city go straight to rehab? Dr. Drew? Where were you on this one?

This poll doesn’t make any sense, we have the worlds happiest Mayor, Oscar Goodman! Goodman is so happy his nose is shiny red and bulbous.

OK, the first step to rehab is admitting to the problem: Nevada residents have been hit hard with the foreclosure crisis, unemployment rate is at 13.1 percent- higher than the entire nation (9.7 percent thus far).

Our service industry is suffering tremendously because we never saved for a rainy day- no, we didn’t save for our college education. However, you can say many residents helped fund some college tuition one lap dance at-a-time. Bygones…

Nevertheless, we are still not happy.

But, don’t blame us, blame our parents. Our Governor is out having affairs and then he up and gets a divorce. Papa Obama constantly refers to us as the red-head step-child (no, not literally) and never gives us any words of encouragement- which is very necessary for a family to thrive. Recovery is far ahead, but I doubt we are unhappy. Happy, Shiny, Bulbous People!

According to the list, the unhappiest city is Huntington, West Virginia. The happiest is Boulder, Colorado.

Football Fairytale or Fable?

admin February 8th, 2010

Americans love a good comeback, a rags-to-riches story, an innocent man who gets justice or victory for a city that has been living in turmoil.

This is why yesterday’s Super Bowl win tasted like Pecan Pie for New Orleans and for many Americans. For the first time in NFL history the Saints came up and conquered, restoring hope to a city that has been in a struggling economy for the last four years.  

 After Hurricane Katrina, Americans showed solidarity and assisted New Orleans by setting up relief funds, medical aid, rebuilding houses, and donating time to America’s city in chaos.

 New Orleans hung in there, took their handouts and did what was necessary to survive after such a devastating event. But, yesterday was different.

 The Saints sent out one big thank you to all of America and finally won back their city fair and square. No more handouts. It was symbolism at its best. Maybe even a fairytale…the stories my mom would prelude with, “remember this is only imaginary.”

 After the game, I thought… finally some good karma, some divine intervention for this city. This is a perfect scenario for an economy that has been suffering for so long. This victory is sure to give New Orleans a good boost.

 However, my cynical side kicked in, the one where people yell not another conspiracy theory! No, not the voices in my head, but the die-hard Saints’ fans and of course my friends who always cheer for the underdog.

  I started to think… was this another handout given out by Corporate America? Was this an Ode to My Mum: putting out that disclaimer at the beginning of the fairytale?

 The NFL is big business… Did Peyton Manning take one for the other team? Or, did he take one for his home town?

 And, if the Colts did lose this Bowl for the betterment of society aren’t they the real heroes or are they just gettin paid.

 Didn’t this sort of thing happen with boxing too? After a while, we pretty much knew a fight might be fixed? It’s hard to believe that we can’t just have a good ol’ fashion American Football Fairytale rather than a Corporate American Hand-Me-Down Dream.

 Or, perhaps I’m still dealing with mommy issues?

 

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